Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
