i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
