3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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