Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
