so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
