I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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