I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Two words: blizzard sex
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
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