I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
