You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize