Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
