their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Please, let me fuck your mom
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
So much rum. So many feels.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
