I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
