Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I bet he comes in French.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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