I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
it glows. i had to have it.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
