WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
