I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize