I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
