Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I'm just crazy horny about you
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
