I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
