we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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