Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
