took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
