I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
my being single is dangerous.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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