It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize