wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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