i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize