I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
