We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
