I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
