Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
