not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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