was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
