new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
