I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
