I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Randomize
