Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
