when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
