is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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