you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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