god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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