I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
