So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Randomize