I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
