dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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