dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
