i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Randomize