She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
