My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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