I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Sorry my hands just texted you
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize