she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
