Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
