there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
