Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
